Is your glass half full or half empty?

Is your glass half full or half empty?

We all seek happiness.  The term Happiness, means something different  to everyone. One person may believe money would make them happy. Another, if the significant person in their lives changed – then they would be happy.

I know that I am happy when I feel joy –

Laughing at something that appeals to your sense of humour is different to laughing with joy. The ability to feel JOY is my measuring stick to my happiness.  Joy comes from within – it makes me feel expanded – I feel lighter.

In October my Iceberg Rose Garden starts blooming – looking at that first full bloom is one way I can describe the feeling of JOY.  A landscape view,  an ocean view, hearing my daughter laugh, looking at  new born Impalas or little warthogs chasing each other – gives me the feeling of joy – it bubbles up from within and I feel that I am smiling on the inside. 

As a young adult it seemed that I was determined to be unhappy – obviously not consciously. Life presented me with many reasons to be discontent.

I think  even if I won the Lotto and found Brad Pitt (that was then….) on my doorstep on one knee with a ring in his hand – I would have found fault with him too eventually. No matter what  -  I would have eventually landed up in the very same town of UNHAPPYVILLE. 

The cause of each individual’s UNHAPPINESS is unique. There is no “one size fits all” –

The state of our unhappiness inside is easily reflected on the outside and becomes the automatic blame for everything and everyone.    

Do you see the glass half full or half empty?    

I know mine was half empty…..

When we compare ourselves to others – THEIR lives seem to be so much easier, so much better!  As the saying goes: “Don’t compare your life with others – you have no idea what their journey is all about”. From the outside it may seem like a perfect life – it very seldom is.   Have you noticed that?

In order for us to live a healthy and well balanced life we need to understand ourselves and learn to LIKE ourselves –

For us to be able to LIKE ourselves – we need to have SELFWORTH – we need to find the WORTH in SELF.

The WORTH is what we shine out, the energy people sense. This is what people react to. We FEEL each other. That feeling that tells you that you are comfortable with a person – that you like sitting next to a person OR that you don’t like being in that person space.

It is the ENERGY that we carry and this ENERGY reflects how we feel inside -  if you are ANGRY  people can sense it and probably stay far away from you – If you are in a GOOD MOOD people are naturally attracted to you and want to be in your company.

Perhaps you watched the segment when Oprah had the Brain Scientist on her show – she had a stroke at 35 – that left her paralysed and unable to speak. After years of therapy and treatment she fully recovered and wrote the Book:  “My stroke of Insight”. While helpless and unable to speak or move, the only thing she could pick up was the energy people brought into the room, with her right brain (feeling brain). She would know what the person was about – love, resentment, enthusiasm, boredom etc. and got to recognize who it was by the ‘energy’ they radiated.

After she recovered, she did extensive research on the effect of ENERGY that we bring into our life –

Our home, our place of work, everywhere you go. “Be aware of the energy you bring into your space”

Nobody else is responsible for your life. It does not matter what your father did or what your mother did not do. What you do with your life is your responsibility. You can blame everyone that has played a part in your life so far – it still is up to you what you do with your life now. EVERYTHING YOU DO – you do to yourself. If you are angry and aggressive – how do you feel afterwards?  You do this to yourself. If you are kind and patient – you reap the benefit of firstly how you feel inside and also the effect you have on everyone you encounter.

When I finally understood that I can not go through my life blaming my unhappiness on OTHERS – that is when EVERYTHING changed for me –  When I finally stopped WAITING for the day when OTHERS would change, then EVERYTHING changed – even if my life was still essentially the same and not how I wanted it to be!

We are all ORDINARY – Even if we think others seem so much more – or have so much more – we are all the same. The difference comes in with the living intention and integrity I choose to live - this is what adds the little EXTRA and makes and ordinary person EXTRA-ORDINARY and an ordinary life into and EXTRA-ORDINARY life.

The saying goes:  SELF worth is worth much more that net worth.

One of the best gifts we can give ourselves is to get rid of excuses

The dangerous thing about excuses is that if we recite them enough times, we actually come to believe that they are true….

We need to start by taking responsibility for what we bring to the table: Your attitude or ENERGY you bring to your day – to your home, your place of work and everywhere you go. What your eyes say. What your body language says, what words you speak.

You are a unique individual who has a purpose  – the mere fact that you are alive and here means that there is a role that only you can full-fill. You need to find the WORTH in SELF. Take each day as one small step in the right direction. There are no instant fixes. You need to feel good about what you did today. No matter how small or seemingly insignificant. When what you do is attached to good intention and done with integrity – it will have a ripple effect –Everyone who comes into contact with you will be affected.  YOU will notice that too

EVERYTHING YOU DO – YOU DO TO YOURSELF.  IS YOUR  GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL?

The reward is the Joy – when you start feeling Joy you know that you are happy – Life may still not be remotely perfect – but you will know that you are ok –

Karin Engman   Life coach    ermelo   072 1896951 thehummingbird@vodamail.co.za

www.karin-engman.blogspot.com